Sarah Palin, Time Traveler – Chapter Two

Sarah Palin
Time Traveler
Chapter Two

October 28, 1886.

A steamer pulls up to Bedlow’s Island. It is 7 o’clock in the morning. A small crowd of men and women depart from the steamer, heading towards a brand new statue. Today, the Statue of Liberty is going to be unveiled to the world. The crowd mingles for a light lunch after inspecting that everything is okay. The statue is fine. One woman, Mrs. Clarence Carey even decides to climb all the way to the top, stepping outside at the very top, on the balcony around the torch. She is the first woman to have accomplished this. She sighs with pride and satisfaction, looking back at New York City and the United States. Her eyes wander down to the island below. Far, far down below she sees a small person jumping and waving. She wonders, “who is that lunatic?”

On the ground, the frantic jumping of the woman is seen by the remaining members of the American Committee of the Statue of Liberty. At first, they wonder what is wrong with her. Then, they decide, they must approach her. They have one hour until the first steamer full of visitors will arrive at the Statue of Liberty.

Mr. David H. King is selected to see what is the matter. He approaches her with great worry.

“Madam, may I help you?”

“What’s that? I’m so excited to be here!”

“Yes, I imagine you are. Do you know where you are?”

“‘Course I do! That’s the Statute of Liberty!”

“You mean ’statue’?”

“That’s what I darn did there say. Statute!”

“No, you see, you’ve put an extra T in there.”

“I love Ts! Tea Party, whoo hoo!”

“Okay. Staaaaatue. Not Statutttttte. Never mind, doesn’t matter. Are you on the guest list?”

“Always. So let’s get us up in this lovely statute! Time to celebrate freedom!”

“Madam, the President of the United States is on his way here along with a very large contingent of French dignitaries, untold number of police officers, infantry, and various other security forces. You must remove yourself.”

“Boy, you sure do know a lot of funny things and boy do you just keep right on talkin’ there! I hear we got this statute as a warning.”

“A warning? You mean like the horse’s head in Jack Woltz’s bed?”

“You just said a bunch of things that don’t make sense to me so I’m going to respond to what I do know. Other countries don’t want us to be a horse’s ass and become socialist countries. Especially those Frenchies. Do not want us being socialisties.”

“Socialwhaties? You mean the French who just came out of the Franco-Prussian war who then had another revolution who established the Paris Commune to promote worker’s rights who then executed 30,000 for taking part in the Paris Commune? Those freedom lovers? Yes, they do want us to stay a democracy so they’ll have someone to look up to.”

“What? All I know is France is giving us this statute telling us ‘not to blow’ our democracy.”

“Okay. Right. Yes, you’re right.”

“I usually am.”

“Or, they could be giving it to us to commemorate the great shining example that is America. To celebrate the United States rather than to give us a dire warning.”

“Warning. That’s what it is. Big ‘ol warning in the middle of New York Harbor to inspire fear in all Americans not to blow this thing we got going here.  Just like Paul Revere warned the British not to take our arms.  Big warning.”

“Or, as President Cleveland will tell us in a few hours, ‘Instead of grasping in her hand the thunderbolts of terror and of death, she holds aloft the light that illumines the way to man’s enfranchisement … a stream of light (from Lady Liberty) shall pierce the darkness of ignorance and men’s oppression until liberty shall enlighten the world.’ Or something to that effect.”

“Yes. Terror and death! That’s what I said. A warning.”

“Fine. You’re right. Again.”

“Yep.”

“Please leave.”

“Got to warn about becoming socialists!”

“Okay. Can you go stand over there and warn? Just right over there… See where the soldiers are all lined up? Just let them know what you know…”

“Sure can do! Let me just head on over there. Hey, why are they escorting me away? Don’t you want to hear more about socialists?”