Alas, poor Roy! We knew him well…
Poor Roy. Some dude in a collared shirt yells, “Hey, don’t miss it!” at a Tar Heel shooting a free throw and Roy goes apoplectic and has the fan tossed from the Smith Center?
Here’s my Christmas take on the situation:
Every Heel down in Royville liked the Smith Center a lot, but Roy, who lived just north of Chapel Hill – did not. Roy hated the Smith Center – the whole basketball season. Now, please don’t ask why; no one quite knows the reason. It could be, perhaps, that his sling was too tight. Or it could be that his glasses weren’t fitting just right. But I think that the most likely reason of all may have been that his big Jayhawk heart was now two sizes too small.
But whatever the reason, the sling or his glasses, he stood there in the Smith Center hating their “fat asses.” Staring up from his bench like a hater, at the television lights in the Smith Center. For he knew every Heel sitting down in the Dome tonight was busy now planning their Smith Center flight. “And they’re heading to their cars,” he snarled and he cried, “The game’s not even over, it’s practically tied!” Then he growled with his Jayhawk heart continually grieving, “I must find some way to keep the Tar Heel fans from leaving! Why, for six stupid seasons I’ve put up with it now. I must stop the fans from leaving… but how?”
Roy puzzled and puzzled till his puzzler was sore. Then Ol’ Roy thought of something he hadn’t before! Maybe the Tar Heels, he thought, just don’t know how to cheer. Maybe Ol’ Roy… perhaps… should just take over from here!
And what happened then? Well, in Lawrence they say that Ol’ Roy kicked out a stupid convenient fan that day. And then – the true meaning of playing in the Smith Center came through, and Roy found the strength of *ten* security guards, plus two!
Roy sat back down on his bench, as quiet as a mouse. And he, he himself, Ol’ Roy – dreamed of Allen Fieldhouse.
A Little Pick Me Up
Just in case you were feeling blue about the end of the Jayhawks’ football season…
World’s Meanest Soccer Player
I know we can all get a little rough on the soccer field from time to time. I once told a girl, after a particularly harsh slide tackle (although, she may just have sucked and not known how to do a tackle. some people maintain it was clean. I digress) that if she ever touched me again I would kill her. No one prosecuted me, nor did I get a yellow card. There was also the time my entire family, minus my red headed brother, almost got in a fight with the other goalie…. Not that we’re violent people! If, however, I was to engage in any of the things this Elizabeth Lambert did during New Mexico’s game against BYU I should be banned from the sport. And no, her actions aren’t justified just because she was beating up Mormons.
Oh, You Silly Aggies.
I now know why Texas A&M got their ass kicked by K-State. European techno music to pump up before the game? Really? This isn’t an SNL skit! This is Big 12 football!! Final Score: 62-14, K-State.
Big Jay vs. Stephen Colbert
So a bit lame at first, but it picks up steam towards the end and finishes strong, just like the rest of the Jayhawks. Let’s see the Missouri Tiger take on Colbert. Rock Chalk Jayhawk, KU!
.500 At Last!
Okay, so the Royals have only played two games. But still! .500!!
Royals at .500
By the way, if anyone can identify someone other than Coco Crisp in that picture (without cheating) I’ll give you a Gold Star.
Missouri Highlight of the Century
This is the only time you’ll find a highlight from a Missouri basketball game on this blog. (I prefer the Tyus Edney highlight myself). This, however, was impressive, but not as cool as Lebron’s full court heave.
Lebron’s Sick 60 Minutes Shot
Don’t Tout Religion at the NCAAs
Strangest thing I’ve seen yet at the tournament. At the end of the Ohio State – Siena game a man was holding a sign that said John 3:16 behind the Siena bench. A security guard rushes in and yanks the sign out of the guy’s hands taking it away. While everyone on the Siena bench was praying Ohio State would miss their last shot, the guy behind the bench was having his prayer yanked out of his hands. I guess the security guard wasn’t a Saint…fan.
Rock Chalk into the Sweet Sixteen
One of Aldrich's Ten Blocks
Cole Aldrich swatted the Jayhawks into the Sweet Sixteen. First triple double in the tournament (with blocks) since Shaq and the first tiple double at KU since Wilt. Go Jayhawks!!!
